It's Friday!

Yes it is.. and when you find me blogging on a Friday you be well informed that it's quite a slow day to begin with (note: pile of paper got a little higher since my last entry below) and that the inbox isn't as populated as it was 2-3 weeks ago.

Be as it may, Friday to me is kinda like Tuesday or Wednesday although not really like Monday as tomorrow is another working day. Over the almost 10 years working, the only break I got from Saturday was for about 1.5 years where we worked 5 day weeks and Saturdays were days of leisure as were Sundays. I noticed though that in those days, I spent more money as I had more time to spend them in comparison to these days.

Reminder to self: always pay off what you owe before making the first expenditure on yourself.

Guests from the Arabian Peninsular are slowly leaving and remaining now are 3 groups scheduled to arrive in the early days of August. Properties in Langkawi and Penang are fully occupied with late arrivals and it's almost impossible to squeeze any additional rooms out of them.

Feel like doing some photo uploads..

Taken last year when the season was about its peak. I can't recall the reason behind the photo though. This is Lawand Tourism & Travel Sdn. Bhd.

Taken with Lawand Tourism team members. There are a few others but they were not involved in the FAM Trip.

I think I can.. I think I can..

Oh! MUMMYY!! hahaha.. Notice that the boat isn't really that far off the island. Such drama. But I belched my tummy's contents right after snorkeling.

Okay, now this is a photo moment :)

I feel happier already.

I wanted it to be a little uplifting, but..

Came to office a little off of time today and received a text message from boss (the one who's on holiday in Malaysia) for something-something. Performed that task and went through some blogs.

Checked my weight on the know-it-all scale at home. I'm 24kg fat, 50+kg muscle and what nots else. My weight is on a yo-yo. After meals it'd be about 84, without meals 80-81. I don't know that weights can go up and down just like that. And with that much margin. My metabolic rate is still 2 which is no different although I force myself to move more. My guess is, this is the indicator that actually tells how healthy a person is. This would also answer statements like, ".. but he was so healthy, participating in sports," and what nots. My body is 41 years old according to the scale.

Yes, the scale's accurate to say the least. I do feel THAT old. Now that I think of it, 41 is not really that far away since I've just turned 33. 7 years ago, 41 is like NOOO!!! hahaha.. My sister's body age is 15. Heh.

Munching chicken sandwich while waiting for that single message from boss asking to meet him gives me the chance to blog. Add the factor of no emails the night before for me to action, it's rather relaxing. Not too relaxing since there's a pile of papers on my left waiting for their time of day. I can't work with interruption because it would upset my mental cabinet and I wait for the moment of expected peace.

Which shouldn't be too far away considering that the season is almost over and bookings are not as forthcoming as we would like to expect. We're quite badly hit. Although Malaysia shows growth, Australia is experiencing a 75% drop from last year's revenue. Which brings me to a question boss asked me last night,

"How would you take to the idea of doing a different job, - with Lawand of course! - in a different country,"

then followed with more under the surface descriptions and ideas.

Jeddah. Sales. Promoting Malaysia by a Malaysian. By far Saudi is the hottest market for tourism in the Middle East. We have an office in Riyadh but not in Jeddah. The idea is still ding-donging - pinball style - in my head. I'd love to. It's a great opportunity to venture into sales as I believe I have the knack for it although I've never done sales for a living before.

But I'm a jack of all trades, am I not? Ho, read it properly, JACK. Of all trades. You funny people better not start reading it as JACK OF. All trades.. :P Kalau tak paham tak apalah.

And Jeddah? Been there for two months and the best I can say about that place is that it's very quiet regardless of the time of the day. It's HOT with hardly any life to live. Forget about hoo-haa-ing. On the other side, it's limitations might be good for me to return to my roots and restart my living. If you've read a few postings prior to this you'd realise that I've been feeling dead for quite a while now although breathing and still living.

Mayat hidup. The western term would be zombie but zombie is as good to describe 'mayat hidup' as envy would be to describe 'dengki'.

I don't know if I can make it through. Wait. I know I'll make it through when I have to. I'm not the quitter.

Although the 'making it through' might also include lots of mental suffering and physical abuse as well.

Another dead posting. Sigh..

I am 33 today and I feel like I have at most 50% of life remaining.

I know it's a day when I should be merry acknowledging how age has turned and what achievements I have made the past 365.25 days. The few weeks running up to my 33rd year of existence has been hectic but despite those time occupying hours, I still managed moments when I reflected not on the year that had passed but the years ahead.

And posted, "I am 33 today and I feel like I have at most 50% of life remaining."

I've been getting small signs of mortality every now and then when my chest hurts, and I get the feeling of clotting veins, experience occasional short of breaths, light headedness and not to mention the now infamous occasional severe back aches. They don't happen often but they happen often enough that wakes me up every time they do.

Then I think of death and how much it'd hurt in the interim to the hereafter. How much I'd miss the people I'll leave behind. Truth is, once I die, I'd be suffering so much that I don't think I'll even have time to think of the life I've left behind.

Then I think of the rewards of people who receives Allah's Favours and the followers of Muhammad, peace be upon him. I think of the promise of partners in heaven, the promise of such beautiful life that you'll never have to wonder again. The promise of eternity.

I am afraid. I feel fear as I write this down. I am not ready to leave now but I am not preparing myself enough either.

I am afraid..